Ok, I never actually had to ask that question. I knew where the thermometer went way before I even thought about having children. I just never envisioned that I would be the one that put it 'there'.
So, one night after Lily received her first round of vaccinations and she was screaming her head off, I told Rob to get the vaseline. Since he would never do something that required him to have such nimble fingers, I determined that I would just have to take one for the team. I had Rob shine a flashlight near her bum just to make sure I was getting in right. As he held her legs up, I put vaseline on the tip of the thermometer and gently push it in just a little.
Whoever made an infant tush thermometer that took three minutes to take a damn temp obviously didn't have children. She squirmed and squirmed and it fell out and I tried again. In trying again, I was concerned that I was pushing it in more than I was supposed to, so I put my face real close to her bum just to make sure it wasn't in to far. And, of course, that's when it happened. I could see her little tush hole opening up ever so slightly and with it came a burst of wind so foul that I almost fell over laughing and crying all at once.
Moral of the story: when taking a tush temp, get a magnifying glass. It serves well as a visual enhancer and barrier all in one.
